I Am Not Satisfied

I am not satisfied. Perhaps you are thinking, That is a strange thing for a Christian to be saying! Aren’t Christians supposed to be content? After all, 1 Timothy 6:6 says, “But godliness with contentment is great gain.” 

Nevertheless, I am not satisfied. I am not content with my Christian life as it is. I am not at ease with my level of love for God and my devotion to Him. The closer I draw to Christ, the more I find that I am lacking. And how great is my deficiency! I am not satisfied.   

The water streams that once gurgled and flowed have emptied into a stagnate swamp. I want to move on, but I find no outlet. As I trod a pilgrim’s pathway, sometimes the road is easy. The Lord is so close, and I hear His voice continually. Like a spring flower under the warm rays of sunshine and gentle rain showers, I am thriving spiritually. And then at other times I feel that I have come to a brick wall that is blocking me from proceeding any further in my Christian walk. My enemy would wish me to be content with the progress I have already made and accept this as the end of my long journey. But I must press beyond this point! I must strive to attain higher things for the glory and honor of my Lord! I am not satisfied.

Are you satisfied? Have you reached that brick wall, that stagnating swamp? At different times in our lives I believe we all come to such a place. We all come upon those obstacles in the road. Basically, anything that keeps us from going on in our Christian life, anything that hinders us from attaining victory and then pressing on, is a road block. You and I know when we have reached our brick wall. We are well aware of what has caused our once- flowing stream to stagnate. It is different for each one of us. But it is always the point of decision. We have two options. We can stop and be content with the progress we have made and the victories we have already won, or we can look at the obstacle before us and see it as a challenge to overcome. Will I crush my own carnal desires and ideas and battle my way past this point to triumph, or will I follow my lazy, wicked flesh and quit here? Will I be satisfied?

In the ministry I have seen many folks come through our church. These people had great potential for God. It was a wonderful thing to see them growing and getting the victory over the strongholds of sin. But they each came to a brick wall--the place where they had to choose between Self and God. For one family it was the road block of child discipline, for another it was the area of modest clothing. Others reached the stumbling stone of a counterfeit woman. I have watched as they came to these points of deciding between Biblical principles or personal, pride-driven ideas. The families who have left our church reached these decision points and decided not to attempt to conquer them. They chose to take the easy way and glory in past victories while stopping at a brick wall in their Christian lives. They were satisfied. 

I see other thriving families and singles in our church who, one by one, have reached the road block of fasting, or clothing, or tithing, and they decided to take the challenge and press on in their spiritual journey. They decided that their relationship with Christ was worth fighting for. They would not be content to love Him a little. They would give Him all that was in their power to give. They would not be satisfied, and the fact that they are in church and trying to do right proves that they still are not satisfied. 

I am not satisfied. I am not content to be a stagnating, lazy, good-for-nothing Christian. A calm sea may seem nice for a short while, but if I wish to reach my desired haven, the winds must blow and waters must toss me to and fro. The beauty of a clear gurgling stream will be forgotten if I allow the small, seemingly harmless sticks and leaves of sin to settle in my flowing waters. They will soon make my waters slow and murky with the gathering debris, and eventually everything I worked so hard to achieve will die as I stagnate in sin and self. By refusing to be satisfied, I will create an outlet for my once-flowing stream by removing all that I know to be sin. 

Traveling the pilgrim’s path, I am not contented to dwell on this plain of sleepy bliss. I see a mountain looming before me, and I know that just beyond that peak is where victory lies. I wish to attain greater heights of faith and success for my Lord. If I stop here, I will never amount to anything. Oh, that I might press past this point! I refuse to be content with my Christian life as it is now. I want to go beyond the things I’ve always known, the victories of the past I’ve already won. I need more love for God, for others. I want more of my Christ! I desire a fresh filling of His power. I am not satisfied!