Watch Your Words; Keep Your Words

Words are a powerful thing. Words can build up, or words can destroy. God’s written Word, the Bible, will build us up and strengthen us, whereas man’s words will often bring us sorrow and disappointment. I’m thankful I can trust God to keep His word…and to keep my words spoken to Him in secret. 

I marvel as I look back on my life. The day we left the States to be missionaries to the country of Holland I considered it a tragedy that I had to leave all my friends behind. Little did I realize that our separation would be the biggest blessing! Truly, God does work ALL THINGS together for good to them that love Him. The Lord took what looked like a bad thing and used it for my better interest. I am reminded of Joseph’s words to his brothers in Genesis 50:20: “But as for you, ye thought evil against me; but God meant it unto good.” If you are serving God wholeheartedly, He is going to use what seems like bad or unfortunate circumstances for His glory and your benefit. 

It wasn’t always easy for my siblings and me to be without young friends our age. The fact is, life became a lot harder when some children in the neighborhood began playing with us. We were put in difficult circumstances and under pressure to do bad things by these “friends.” Sometimes they would talk about things we weren’t allowed to be talking about. A series of minor issues caused my parents to encourage us to slowly separate from our friends. I’m so thankful for my parents’ wise insight. They were looking into the future and seeing what problems would arise if we became polluted by these children. As we grew older, it was clear that our neighborhood friends were going in a different direction, and separation was the only option. That was hard at first, but it got easier with time.    

I used to think I was deprived, not having friends my own age. Besides my siblings I really didn’t have anybody to play with. This caused my family and me to bind in extra special ways. Instead of clinging to my best friends for joy and happiness in life I learned to seek out the Best Friend a girl (or boy) could ever know. Proverbs 18:24 tells of a friend that sticketh closer than a brother. This Friend is Jesus. His arms are outstretched to anyone who is searching to be close to Him. I’m thankful that 13 years of my life were divinely directed away from flighty friends to the ever-faithful Friend, Jesus!

Now I’m 21. I look back on those years as a teenager. Honestly, if you paid me a million dollars I wouldn’t do them over…and this is with growing up in a Christian home and the Lord as my comfort and strength through those years of maturing. I remember the mood swings, the rebellious feelings that would try to take control. There were times when my mom and I really clashed. Those years were crucial. I’m so thankful that my parents were deeply involved in my life and spent their time and energy to make sure I would turn out okay. I thank God for His protection during those years of extreme vulnerability. 

One thing my parents always told me was to talk to them. If I needed to share my thoughts and feelings, they always made themselves available. Fact is, many times I remember Mom sitting on my bed, willing me to talk, but the words just wouldn’t come. Sometimes you just can’t express your emotions with words. Sometimes words aren’t good enough. I remember crying. I felt like a war was raging inside me. I wanted to be a good girl, but it seemed no matter how hard I tried, I was always failing. Everything inside was in turmoil. I felt like I was all alone and nobody could possibly understand. I didn’t realize that my mom had once been in the very place I was in, only she didn’t have the privilege of being brought up in a Christian home, and she didn’t get saved until she was 21. 

Words. I’ve been thinking about them lately, and the great impact they can have on our lives. Our words, or words spoken by others, can make or break us. Proverbs 18:21says, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue.” Words have the ability to start world wars, and words have the ability to create peace. How very important our words are! 

I came across this thought-provoking quote recently:

Watch your thoughts, for they become words.

Watch your words, for they become actions.

Watch your actions, for they become habits.

Watch your habits, for they become character.

Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny. 

  

The Bible says that “out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh.” Thoughts do become words. Have you ever had this happen to you, where you are doing something and talking to somebody and suddenly something having to do with what you are thinking about will suddenly pop out of your mouth? I’ve had that happen before. Sometimes it’s funny; sometimes it’s embarrassing. The thoughts we entertain will eventually become verbalized with words. What do you think about? What do you talk about? To whom do you talk?  

My parents always encouraged me to talk to them, not my friends. They knew all too well the devastating results of girls tittering to girls about foolish things and then stabbing each other in the back. My mom has always been there to listen to my words. Words of sadness, words of frustration, words of hope. Now that I’m a grown up lady, I count my mom my best friend. We’ve been through a lot together, and that had made us strong. I know I can confide in Mom, and she will always understand, or at least try to understand. I’ve been able to tell my mom the deepest secrets of my heart, and she has faithfully kept them to herself…which is what a true friend does! Friends our own age will often betray us, but the Lord never will, and if our parents love and are serving God, they never will either. Our parents should always be the ones to whom we turn when we feel the need to share our feelings and dreams.    

Proverbs 25:2 says, “It is the glory of God to conceal a thing.” Some thoughts and words need to be hidden away safely, like a treasure. There was a time when the Lord showed me something from His Word…something that left me in shock for days…and I kept this secret to myself. It was too wonderful and precious to tell. Never had God given me such clear and specific instruction as to His will for my future. For weeks I concealed this thing, and then when I felt I could find the words to describe it, I went to my parents. It would have been fun to tell one of my girlfriends, but I realized that only my parents could appreciate the seriousness of this subject. To approach a friend before my parents would naturally cause them to assume that my news wasn’t as serious as I believed it to be. The king’s messenger will not be sidetracked or convinced to share his confidential message with anyone besides the one who should be receiving it. To spread the news before delivering it to its rightful owner would be to dilute its message. For this reason, I kept my precious secret, only sharing it with my parents, who I knew I could trust. 

Proverbs 29:11 says, “A fool uttereth all his mind: but a wise man keepeth it in till afterwards.” In a long list of “times,” Ecclesiastes 3:7 mentions, “A time to keep silence, and a time to speak.” There is a time and a place for everything. There is a time to say what is in your heart, and there is a time to keep it quiet. A foolish person says everything he/she is feeling inside, but a wise person hides it in his/her heart, ponders it, and keeps it “till afterwards.” Proverbs 10:32 says, “The lips of the righteous know what is acceptable: but the mouth of the wicked speaketh frowardness.” Do acceptable things come from your mouth? A Christian should never go around saying things that make him/her look foolish or that make light of serious things. Watch your words! Keep your words! 

The Bible, especially Proverbs, is full of instructions as to how we should use our lips and what words should come out of them. Proverbs 10:19 says, “In the multitude of words there wanteth not sin: but he that refraineth his lips is wise.” God gave us two ears and one mouth. That means we should be twice as quick to listen as to speak. And not everything we hear is supposed to be passed on to others. Maturity and godly integrity will cause us to know what is right for us to say to somebody else and what is not right. The Lord doesn’t appreciate gossiping tongues, neither do other people! Can your friends trust you enough to talk in your presence without you spreading every little thing they say around the church, neighborhood, etc.? Proverbs 20:15 says, “There is gold, and a multitude of rubies: but the lips of knowledge are a precious jewel.” Are your lips like a precious jewel? 

If you honor your friends, it’s likely that they will honor you. Your TRUE friends won’t embarrass you by spreading your secrets around. Somebody said, “If you wish another to keep your secret, first keep it to yourself.” Very wise suggestion! Because “he who gives up the smallest part of a secret has the rest no longer in his power.” People will turn around and twist your words to another person so they end up hurting you. You can become ensnared by your own words if you aren’t careful who you confide in. Proverbs 18:8 says, “The words of a talebearer are as wounds, and they go down into the innermost parts of the belly.” Ouch! That sounds painful. It is! I know from experience.     

Watch your thoughts, for they become words.

Watch your words, for they become actions.

Watch your actions, for they become habits.

Watch your habits, for they become character.

Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny. 

Our thoughts, our words, who we confide in…all these things have the power to change a person for the better or for the worse. Our words are so very important! Watch your words. Keep your words! They have the power to shape your future!